watching the dream fade

So i have finished this rigorous semester, and among many hard learned lessons I can say this much for sure: I am not going to major in physics, nor will I even venture to try.

This sounds like something basic that I should have learned some time ago, but no. I once dreamed of being a physicist. I longed to make long and accurate calculations about life and to be able to understand the various occurences of existence. with the realization of how dry calculus is, and how dificult it is to understand physics to that level, I must let the dream of being an erudite scientist, with know-how about nearly everything.

It makes me wonder about others, and their dreams(or fantasys rather). I feel like the point where the dream meets reality is always an underwhelming one. For instance, I feel like Ringo Starr has these same sort of feelings in his song liverpool. The dream of the 60’s was one that was meant to last forever. But they didn’t. maybe in some ways that is cession to miller, but also I think it’s true. Even now, as I plan to become a professor of either philosophy or english, I am forced to consider that the life I know dream of and plan is never going to be. Even, within this semester, I am forced to realize the plans of having certain professors in my senior year are impossible.

These dreams, that are doomed to never manifest, are what we are told to hold on to. are we holding on to lies? Are we forever reaching for the unreachable? Is this what we are fated, dissappointment?

But what else do we have?

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